Your path to your way

Doing things your way can feel overwhelmingly daunting at times. You might worry about upsetting others with your choices and preferences. You may also fear the sense of insecurity and unsteadiness that comes with making decisions that truly reflect your beliefs.

This is all very valid and natural for humans. We're inherently embedded in social groups—and thankfully so. One crucial function of being surrounded by others is that we keep each other in check and sane. If we were all left alone with our thoughts, very few people could handle that situation while maintaining their sanity.

Solitude can be challenging for this reason: thoughts constantly pass through our conscious awareness. These thoughts are often distorted due to the cognitive biases (faulty reasoning) inherent to our species. The entire practice of meditation—particularly in Western society—is founded on the pursuit of stillness in the midst of such reality.

For the same natural reason mentioned above, you may fear doing things your way due to potential disapproval from your social circle, regardless of its size. However, there's a middle ground you can find.

You can do things your way without stepping on others' toes. It's possible to be respectful in your independence. You can pursue your path quietly, when no one is watching, with the same conviction as when you're in the spotlight.

This approach to living cultivates inherent confidence and self-efficacy—the belief that you can tackle any challenge and gracefully handle setbacks without being shattered.

Doing things your way may be essential to achieve your goals, especially if they're truly what you desire. Morgan Housel explores this concept in this article.

By the same token, you need to strike a balance between self-efficacy and humility. Be ready to change your beliefs when your chosen path proves wrong or doesn't feel right, despite your initial thoughts. This concept ties into your identity, which I've explored in depth here.